The Truth About You

by Claire Vorster on August 5, 2013

“The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is.” Winston Churchill

How much time do you spend thinking about other people? Specifically, wondering or worrying about what other people think about you.

TV, newspapers and magazines only encourage this kind of anxiety as they spend endless energy mulling over other people’s marriages, beauty issues, health and finances. You name it, someone out there will have a critical opinion.

That marriage was never going to last, she looks older don’t you think, he only married her for her looks, she can never keep a man…

You can almost feel the oxygen leaving the room.

One of the ways we humans have learned to mask our own insecurities is to build ourselves up by pulling other people down. By making somebody else out to be inferior, we are rewarded with a temporary rush of superiority. When I say a temporary rush, I mean in the same way that a cigarette offers quick calm, a drink doles out fast pain relief or cocaine delivers happiness. Speedy, utterly toxic and with far reaching consequences.

From family members to firm friends, from a trusted colleague to a total stranger. I’m sure you can remember a time when someone delivered their critical opinion about you.

You just aren’t cut out for it, no one likes you, you’re biggest problem is, you’ll never make it, you aimed far too high, you used to be so…., you are so….

And so it goes on.

The thing is, people can say what they like about you. And then there’s the truth.

“An error does not become truth by reason of multiplied propagation, nor does truth become error because nobody sees it.” Mahatma Gandhi

The truth is that you are loved. Every minute of every day. And just in case you want it in writing, here’s the difference between the lies and the truth about you.





You are a loser.

You have nothing to lose.

You are a liability.

You are His gift.

You are alone.

He is with you.

You are a failure.

His love never fails you.

You are weak.

He is strong.

You are lost.

You are found.

You would be better off dead.

You are the best.

Who do you think you are?

You are loved.

You have got everything wrong.

He has made everything right.

You are nothing.

You are everything.

You are worthless.

You are beyond price.

You do not belong.

You are His own.

God is not looking for ways to pull us down. He promises to build us up. The truth is that God is love and you? You are secure.

 ”My eyes will watch over them for their good, and I will bring them back to this land. I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them.” Jeremiah 24 v6, NIV

That’s something to think about.

He believes in you.



Space, The Final Frontier

by Claire Vorster on July 29, 2013

“Therefore, dear Sir, love your solitude and try to sing out with the pain it causes you. For those who are near you are far away… and this shows that the space around you is beginning to grow vast…. be happy about your growth, in which of course you can’t take anyone with you, and be gentle with those who stay behind.” from Letters to a Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke

Some roads were made to be walked alone. But does anyone love enforced solitude much? Being alone suggests that either no one is there or no one can be there.

Some roads we end up further along than those we started with, other times we simply get left behind.

If we are too far ahead of those we’d like to be walking with, the temptation is to take our eyes off the road and keep straining backwards.  If we are left behind, the straining can quickly turn to grief.

The problem is, we move on.  We move geographically away from the people who know us.  We move physically as our bodies change.  We encounter obstacles or challenges that others have not met.  We are not understood, or we don’t understand. Whatever happens, we are different.

Loneliness, simply put, is when you can’t find a valid connection between yourself and anyone else.  And the strangest part of it is that we can be laughing, talking, seemingly involved and yet completely cut off.  Over the border.  Unseen.

“There is a part of the human experience which is solitary, and part of that solitary reality is broken. Part of what it means to be human being involves a certain amount of loneliness or isolation that simply feels off… nevertheless it’s very real. There is a piece of our relating to God, ourselves, others and all of creation that is still fractured…out of whack.” Tim Suttle,

But what if loneliness is in fact space, more than that, what if that space is required for growth?  What if, instead of being alone, rather we are set apart? What if the road laid out for us does not take us away, but instead leads us to where we are meant to be?

Meant to be.

To be.

Not someone else, not somewhere else, but right where you are meant to be.

And to become.

What if we change perspective, look right around, and see that space behind or up ahead as a teacher rather than a slave master? And what if that space is not empty, but completely full?

“Don’t expect any understanding; but believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.” Letters to a Young Poet, Rainer Maria Rilke

Then, maybe even if we are not understood, or we don’t understand. It’s OK.

He believes in you.



The Power of Now

July 18, 2013

“There is only one time that is important – Now! It is the most important time because it is the only time when we have any power.” 
Leo Tolstoy On days from hell, my head, without permission, will host a huge party with a marquee so that all my mistakes and failures can comfortably meet [...]

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No Matter Where You Are, This Works

July 10, 2013

“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.” William Shakespeare, 1564-1616 Sea, forests and deserts, they are hard to navigate. There are no easy signposts, no conveniently situated Tourist Information points just waiting to show a poor, lost traveler the way home. When you venture [...]

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Why Stop Now?

July 1, 2013

“It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.” Leonardo da Vinci Oh how we humans love what we think we know. The earth is ours and all that is in it. If we only focus, we can do anything, be anyone. We are great and capable – after all we have [...]

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Moving On

May 29, 2013

“It’s me. I chose this. I chose all of this — this rock has been waiting for me my entire life. I’ve been moving towards it my whole life.” from Between a Rock and a Hard Place by Aron Ralston How many times have you moved on?  How often has your life been packed into [...]

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When The Storm Comes

May 22, 2013

“Change is like a storm at sea. If you do your duty, strap yourself to the mast and hold your ground, you’ll weather the storm alright. But cower with fear belowdecks, the ship will be torn asunder – and you’ll find yourself in the cold confines of the briny deep. This I suppose was a [...]

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May 14, 2013

“The best mirror is an old friend.” George Herbert Where do you belong? Who do you belong too? Do you know what it’s like to have a room of people pleased to see you or is your nose invariably pressed up against the mirror of someone else’s happiness? Belonging at it’s best brings comfort, friendship, [...]

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The Art Of Flying

May 1, 2013

“There is an art to flying, or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” Douglas Adams, Author of The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Universe All of us are headed home. We start out with nothing, no baggage, not a stitch of clothing to our name [...]

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Always, Like Tomorrow’s Sky

April 21, 2013

All I know is that I’ve wasted all these years looking for something, a sort of trophy I’d get only if I really, really did enough to deserve it. But I don’t want it anymore, I want something else now, something warm and sheltering, something I can turn to, regardless of what I do, regardless [...]

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